“Family Source Consultants (FSC) made it obvious from my very first interaction with them that they were in the business of creating families for all the right reasons. They had the same goal as me and helped guide me through all parts of the process. From application to finding the most amazing Intended Parents and even being a support system and guiding light throughout the journey, FSC was a dream to work with.”
Q: What led you to become a Surrogate?
My Mom passed away two and a half years ago and my life changed dramatically in many different ways. I had to learn to forgive quickly, to grieve gracefully and how to overcome a loss I never really anticipated. My Mom was a bright soul who lived a good life; a life with laughter and a full heart, a life that anyone would be pleased with when their own time came to pass. Her love for life and her children is what taught me to love my own life and child. Her legacy may have been small but her influence was substantial. When she slipped away while holding my hand, something inside me shifted. It sent me into a state of reflection and soul searching. How could I be sure I made her proud? How could I spread the love she so easily passed to everyone she touched? How could I make sure that big smile of hers lived on in Heaven and in others here on Earth? It then occurred to me, not everyone is able to have that. Not everyone can build a family and a legacy on their own. This is when I saw the world’s most fulfilling opportunity to be sure those questions of “how” I posed were answered: gestational surrogacy.
Q. Who was/is your greatest support person/s throughout your journey?
My largest support person throughout my journey was my best friend, Katelyn. She understood my desire to help create a family and was there for me every step of the way. Although we were always close, I believe the journey brought us closer than ever.
Q. What made you decide to choose your Intended Parents?
I chose my Intended Parents because I could tell how much they loved one another and how much the deserved a family of their own. They shared with me many insights into their journey as a couple and their journey to parenthood with me. I immediately felt as though I had known them my whole life and I felt part of their family from the very start. They shared many of the same parenting views that I also hold and I knew that even when times get rough, they would have the best interest of their little one at heart.
Q. What are some of the highlights of your journey?
After an early lost, we had our third IVF treatment which resulted in a healthy little embryo implanting. We had a scare in the first trimester as a result of a subchorionic hematoma which was overwhelming in many ways. You don’t often hear about this common side effect as a result of IVF, and with the fact that my Intended Parents live outside of the United States, we were all very nervous. Thankfully, the hematoma subsided and the pregnancy was smooth sailing from there. Although this was an international surrogacy, the use of technology helped lessen the hardship of distance. We utilized FaceTime, texting, and phone calls to remain close and the Intended Parents were able to fly in to join me for our anatomy scan which was such a beautiful thing to experience with them. When it was time to deliver, having them by my side as they welcomed their baby boy was just as comfortable and emotional as having my own family in the room. The love that filled the delivery room was extremely powerful and moving.
Q. Do you have advice for women who are interested in becoming a gestational surrogate?
My advice for women who are interested in becoming a gestational surrogate is to remember that life is full of ups and downs. Becoming a gestational surrogate is an extremely selfless choice to even consider. I understand the decision, much like the journey, is not always an easy one to make but it is an experience that truly makes a difference. While it may be easy to assume “I’ll get pregnant on our first transfer” the truth is pregnancy is still very much a game of roulette even when technology is involved. The creation of life can be assisted but much of assisted reproduction is left to fate. When a successful pregnancy is created, it is also important to remember not every pregnancy is created equal; everyone’s journey is different. Hormones will most certainly run rampant but having faith in whatever it is that you believe in is crucial. It will be hard at times throughout the entire process but remembering the happiness that you will be giving to a deserving parent or parents will be well worth it in the end.
Q. What did you find was the biggest misconception people had about surrogacy?
I found the biggest misconception people had about surrogacy was that it is a flawless process. Science and the medical field has played such a huge role in helping to create families that I think people forget we are not as largely in control of our bodies or fate as we like to believe. A pregnancy might not result on the first or second try, sometimes it may not result at all, and if a pregnancy does result, it may not be a walk in the park.
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